If it's meant to be...

...It will be easy. Seriously. It won't take hours of effort and weeks of planning. It will fall into your lap when you least expect it and it will flow beautifully from start to finish. Yes, there will be a few speed humps along the way, but this is life after all - we can't expect everything to run smoothly all the time!

Relationships
The tougher it is, the less it is meant to be. The most beautiful, honest, working relationships are those that simply happen and both partners make it work, without it being a HUGE effort. The minute a relationship is more hard work than pleasure, it is just not meant to be I'm afraid.

Career
If you are in a job where you feel that every day is like running UP a treadmill on a 100 degree incline, it is not meant to be. Get out and go and do something that feels a little easier. I am not saying that success comes from sitting on your butt all day, but I feel it's important to mention that if you are barking up the wrong tree, you will know it! No matter how hard you try for that promotion, for some reason, it will always seem out of your reach.

Life
People tire themselves out trying to be someone else's version of perfect. If you are not meant to be skinny, you never will be. If you are not meant to be CEO of a company, you won't be. So try to be YOUR version of perfect - decide what makes you tick and then let it happen. The universe will hear you the first time, so picture your dream life and then get on with reality. Chances are that if you are meant to have what you wish for, you will.

Perfect Imperfections

It is in the imperfect that we find true beauty.

We are all searching for our own measure of perfection - to lose those extra kilos in order to flaunt a 'perfect' body, to refrain from saying how we really feel in order to maintain the 'perfect' relationship, to dye our hair the 'perfect' colour in at attempt to hide our true roots, to have the 'perfect' career so that we can have the 'perfect' life with the 'perfect' car and the 'perfect' family.

In nature, it is the imperfections that make us stop and stare - the rugged rocks alongside the picturesque lake, the lone daisy in amongst a field of daffodils, the vulnerable tree with half its leaves missing - revealing how even inanimate things seem to have feelings.

And isn't it strange how we are drawn to the runts of the litter - the puppy with the crooked ear and toothy grin, the kitten with the oddly shaped tail, lost in her own world. These beautiful, imperfect creatures are the ones that bring us the most joy, whose spirit shines through and whose character far outshines their beautifully manicured, perfect brothers and sisters.

We have all been blessed with our own imperfections - big ears, freckles, some extra curves, a shapely butt, short legs, a long torso, nose hair, moles, dark eyebrows, mis-shapen teeth. All of these beautiful imperfections are what make us even more lovable and what set us aside from everyone else.

Next time you are about to judge yourself or someone else on what you have been told by society is an 'imperfection', stop and think twice - could it actually be something beautiful, something that makes that person sparkle with individuality? I'm sure you could think of a few aspects of yourself that make you the person you are, rather than make you less perfect.

Start today - look for the perfect imperfections everywhere you go and in everyone you meet. I guarantee your life will become more magical by the minute.

Did I hear someone say perfect?

We all need different things. Physically, we trust our bodies to tell us what we need to eat to remain healthy. Mentally, we trust our minds and the knowledge around us to keep us wise and in tune. Emotionally, we try as much as we can to listen to our hearts and be honest with ourselves and others.

Sometimes, however, we are not completely sure of how we feel and we struggle to express it. This is when we need those around us to read our emotions and figure out what will propel us into a positive space. When we are feeling low, we may struggle to see the light - we cannot tell anyone what we need, as we ourselves, are completely unsure and confused. As a result, we feel inadequate and this causes a chain reaction of negative emotions.

How many of you have heard yourself shout this phrase when someone has tried to lend a helping hand: 'You just don't understand!' Next time, stop and think twice before you respond. That person probably does understand - in fact, they may have experienced exactly what you are going through. The only difference is that their band aid is different to ours.

Gary Chapman wrote an extremely insightful book into the various languages we each speak when it comes to love and affection. What we need from those around us to feel optimistic and loved is completely different to what our partner / friend or family member may need. Here's how Chapman differentiates our languages:

1. Acts of Service – When our spouse / friend / family member helps with daily activities such as cooking, cleaning, feeding the children, mowing the lawn, washing up.
2. Receiving Gifts – When our spouse / friend / family member gives us tangible contributions such as love notes, presents from a business trip abroad, perfume, flowers, rugby tickets.
3. Quality Time – When our spouse / friend / family member wants to spend time with us, doing something together or simply chatting and listening.
4. Physical Touch – When our spouse / friend / family member willingly gives us hugs, kisses, and wants to hold hands or be intimate.
5. Words of Affirmation – When our spouse / friend / family member gives us a constant supply of positive comments congratulating us on a job well done or simply saying how wonderful we are.

In order to really feel noticed, we need those around us to speak our language. Just as those we care about need us to understand which dialect they may be speaking. Do yourself a favour and figure out what languages you and those around you speak - it will make life a whole lot easier and will help you to create long-lasting, beautiful relationships.